When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
There's tequila in my general area. Please pray for me.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize