I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Jake bring pizza.
JAKE BRING PIZZA.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
I remember that. We went to taco bell looking for pizza.
He gave me an ambien and I woke up with a raw chicken bone in my purse. I have no idea why but I hope I put it in his butt
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