I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
Con: they had to cauterize my wound twice. Pro: The docs agreed I'll be able to get really drunk tonight since I've lost so much blood.
sound pretty economical
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
I think I'm allergic to vodka. Or people getting engaged. One or the other. I want to die.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
I RAN OVER A NUN! I RAN OVER A FUCKING NUN! GOD WILL NEVER FORGIVE ME FOR MY SINS NOW!!!
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
At one point she put on my dads pants and yelled after him EMILIOOOO! Dude, my dads name is Mark.
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