id fuck shawn from boy meets world only if we could name the baby topanga.
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
she said she'd get any tattoo I wanted ... so she's getting a large crossword puzzle as a tramp stamp. I'm the Einstein of doggy style
an unopened bag of salt and vinegar chips... probably the best thing I've ever found in my room while high.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
No one suspects that a sweet girl who is excited about her anniversary with her bf just blew her partner at work in a communal area a few hours ago, so its cool.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
I'm driving home wearing one sock, boxers, and a tee shirt. That's how good it was
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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