I wannas sexs uuuuu
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
What do you mean you don't pregame your bikini waxes?
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
I used that money i stole from the stripper last night to pay for my date tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
I am one with the molecules
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize