i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
peeing off your aunts pourch into the koy pond seemed like a good idea at the time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Of all the shitty people we associated with, you should be happy that I'm the one fucking your cousin. Sorry.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Didn't want to waste the cheese dust from the white cheddar popcorn, so I gave him a handjob, followed by the most delicious blowjob ever. Win-win.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
Who gets call-your-ex-from-4-years-ago drunk on a Thursday??
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
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