people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
porn star boner night. come get it.
I believe I convinced two girls to makeout for freedom last night Hahaha
i was mezmorized. she was the most beautiful girl that looked like a boy i ever seen
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Ok not good, my info has definitely been submitted to this sugar daddy website before.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
I'm so proud of us for not dying.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
He is a sweet angel sent from dick heaven!
Woke up with a glow stick in my boobs this morning. Must've dominated Sunday.
Randomize
