Nope changed our mind. Decided your strange bacon like body odor wasn't what we want to smell tonight.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
They peed on our pledges last night... i dont know if i should put an lol at the end of that or not
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Um I just overheard that the new guy spent a month in jail. Obvi another great hire.
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
He yanked my breathe right strip off in the middle of me riding him.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
