in vegas stuck in the middle of a pride right now
Pride?
thats a pack of cougars
go fuck yourself
Tears do usually get me what I want. That and oral sex.
I dont think problem is the right word. Problems arent something you enjoy. Life would be too boring without gambling.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
High as shit. I just described caramel syrup on crackers to my mom for 15 minutes...
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
If we hadn't just agreed to no commitment, i'd totally propose right now. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
