We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I feel like the only way to get him to stop is by telling him i'm tired from fucking our other friend every night this week
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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