Dogs love guiness but it fucks up their kidneys
Apparently when you order 'bottomless fries' at red robin that doesnt mean you can go around to every table and eat all the fries you want off other peoples plates.
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
Drunk at a girls little league game. Hello summer.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
You know it's a good weekend when you wake up on Sunday questioning your sexuality.
you really need to remember next time not to write your name and phone number on the paper its wrapped in.
But what if it got lost?
its illegal. you dont want people to contact you if they find it.
Grab some lube and condoms and you get a free shirt? College is weird
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
you know you're doing something right when your drug dealer insists on hugging you before you leave.
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize
