I had a fork in my beer hand and just stabbed my tongue.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
you referred to yourself as the crossing guard because of your neon shirt and began directing bar traffic
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
So you met him?
More like I walked in on him, drunk, naked, and doing "bathtub yoga". Please stop bringing your dates home.
I got to see a stripper that did magic last night. It was glorious.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
