Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
It was good I woke up with my mattress on top of me. I walked around naked the whole night as people wished my Happy Birthday.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
I've decided I'm gonna attack people with the toilet plunger.
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
you can't tell me not to come to work cause roads are bad then ask me an hour later to come in and expect me to be sober
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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