I would have done the walk of shame but I couldnt walk
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
You know, be my cock's hype man.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Honestly, it's not that easy picking a Saturday night outfit that can translate to Palm Sunday mass. Priorities.
Been in the ER for 3 hours now. This hospitals transition to paperless is not going well. But my doctor looks like Elton John and just gave me percocet
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
The extent of "getting it in" was this creepy guy sticking his finger in my bellybutton
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Randomize
