like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
Johns diaper came in the mail. He's freaking out thinking there's some conspiracy going on since he sharted on the drive home from st. Louis
I need to cry about outer space to someone. Can I call you?
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
New reason to drink: alcohol makes soda taste like goddamn gold.
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
