I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
I saw a chick at 8 am this morning walking back to my dorm wearing wings... I'm kind of jealous.
Everything about him screamed your future.
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, at this rate we're going to get arrested a second time tonight.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I text him "Dude. Tryna get fucked here. I only have half the parts. I need your help" I'm sure my mom would be super proud of the woman I have become.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
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