Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
Thanks for holding onto me so I didn't fall in my pee in that parking lot. You're the best boyfriend ever.
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
Im 95% ready to shit behind 711
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
Good, but still not as good as the guy I banged in the ball crawl
Randomize
