So what if i'm late to spanish tomorrow. who the hell cares. i don't even speak spanish.
he sounded really stupid. it was like his puke had a stutter, too.
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I drank toilet water last night, I can't answer you because my phone is in rice.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
you made a mix containing mostly whiskey. then you took a sip, gagged and yelled "perfect!"
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I woke up with leftover chocolate syrup on my nipples. WTF happened last night??
Randomize
