He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
she gave me her number. found out it was already stored in my phone as "bathroom blowjob"
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
He's coming over, and I hope he doesn't get hungry. I'm sure its not proper protocol to bring one booty call to another booty call's house for the munchies.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
Just saw a guy with two baby turtles sneaking into the building
I'm at the level of despair that only Panda Express can fix
so hungover i had to get off the train to puke, rallied and went to work. not sure if that's an adulting win or fail
So when did "Are you okay?" translate into "Don't tell me you got fucked by another rando after another rager"?
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
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