I just realized i haven't had sex in 2009. oh man thats embarrassing.
found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
I'm happily sitting on the toilet cause I'm too tired to move. I'm considering making this my permanent residence. It has a lot to offer.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
hi I'm Emily and I thoroughly enjoy getting minors hammered.. I'll start my AA intro just like that.
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
Randomize
