"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
Next guy we share better have a little more dignity than that
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
well, I was going to forgive her anyway but not because shes my best friend and moreso because shes my drug dealer
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
I just had to remind myself that I'm visible in real life. Sitting in the car in a parking lot, and almost took my shirt off because the tag is itchy and I wanted it off... and you know I don't wear bras...
Is it bad that I'm tindering right now? I'm naked on his couch while he's slaving over legal documents for work. And he doesn't have cable, so what else am I supposed to do?
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
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