his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what's an appropriate "I'm fucking your grandson but I'm trying to hide it" outfit?
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now we're discussing the sex we had and the later lack thereof. It's like marriage counseling via snapchat.
Yeah plus that night got so disgusting it's basically a repressed memory anyway
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
oh man there are to hot chicks wrestling in a pool of maple syrup. ill send you a picture
this is why i will never break up with you
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