I was hooking up with him in my car, he wouldn't stop with my nipples, I had to literally beat him off of me. He kept groaning too while he was doing it. Sick.
Mommy issues
the cop asked for your social security number and you gave her your high school locker combo
The first aid guy just told us to go get hammered...I'm taking his advice
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
It's not a good hook up if during you're thinking "how will this damage me psychologically"
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
But in fairness, I would totally have a robo-penis as long as it had full sensation.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
Alas my dad DD'd me. Legit cock blocked to the highest degree
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
We just FaceTimed and I put an Oreo in my vagina for him. Now he has to fly across the globe for me.
it was a 'fall asleep on the bathroom floor after puking bc the cold tile is legit more comfortable than your bed' kind of night.
Just because I'm asexual doesn't mean I can't have a revenge fuck.
Randomize
