It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
Fucken Tweens. They smelled like cotton candy and hand jobs my nostrils were offended.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
Randomize
