I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
how was your night?
well, i just purchased 'sorry for being a drunk whore' cupcakes. how do you think my night was?
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
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Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
So. I need to gloat. I couldn't exactly tell my family that I won this game by deep throating.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
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I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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