Midget sex pt 2 tonight
id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
This concert is like a reunion of all my bad sex.
my breakfast just consisted of gushers (made with real fruit!) and they're trying to tell me im not eating right?
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
Someone posted a printout of my tits on my door this morning! Where did they get this photo!?!
You kept trying to get the girl i brought home to hook up with you by enticing her with 12 baconnators you brought home
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
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