Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I feel like I just need to fuck him after all his effort. like a "hey man good try" like those kids who get last place and still get a trophy.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
And pointless. I'm fully vested in all my calories coming from booze today. The salad just fucks that shit up
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I woke up an hour ago with orange fingers and a condom stuck to my head.. Wtf just happened?
This may be the most redneck thing I've ever said, but I know all there is to know about farting dogs
Randomize
