Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
I just wrote a self loathing message to self, wrapped my credit card in it, put it in an envelope, sealed it with another hate messame, and put it in my lock box. So. That's where I'm at.
Went online to check my credit card... $147.87 at Waffle House. $632.36 at "Red Rose Gentleman's Club" and a $1000 cash advance from an ATM. I may no longer be a fiancé.
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