I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
are any of them hardcore sluts...just absolute worthless human beings? if not the paper wins
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
It's such a good feeling to send those "I'm not in jail" texts on Sunday morning
Just used my front-facing camera to check my pupils. Technology!
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
hey i'm sure you are probably asleep bc you suck and think sleep is necessary to live or something?
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
