i guess. but if i can salvage this and still somehow see you naked i feel like that's a win
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
You're not stopping till I see you on the ground trying to hold on to shit
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
he had shaved armpits. I repeat: HE SHAVED. HIS. ARMPITS! First hookup of 2014 and it's with a weirdo. Alcohol:1 Me:0
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
It was a good thing I was on the balcony flashing those guys or I would have never seen her skipping to his car
Randomize
