Whats the glycemic index on semen?
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
Send me the picture of my mugshot, my boss got arrested last night and I'm trying to make her feel better.
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Dude you made a rodeo shot in beer pong won the game then got in the hot tub poured beer all over the side and screamed "hot tub time machine!"...
This hangover makes more sense now
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
Randomize
