i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
are you so shy because you have an std?
Guy at red light looking at porn. I'm waiting for him to look over at me so I can shake my head and he can feel bad
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Where did this racoon skin hat, stop sign and bag full of tacos come from?
Narnia or $5 pitcher night either way
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
You've changed since you got that strap on
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Randomize
