No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
i just put all of my beerlympics medals into my academic awards box. i would say they are my greatest achievement since college.
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
Liz is crying about burritos again.
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
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