your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
and by charming I mean he has a horse cock.
One night stand!! Now I'm pissing excellence
That burning is chlamydia
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
i hope not, i just know that at one point I was sitting on the bathroom floor eating bugles and crying because i had no one to show that it looked like I had witch nails when i stuck them on the ends of all ofmy fingers.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
We had phone sex and he came in his sink. i will never eat off one of his plates again
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
cool, get new shit, I dnt want the same old if it's my last drink ever
The world isn't ending you idiot. I'll grab beer
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
Watching Supernatural does more for me sexually than the physical encounters with 90% of the men in my life.
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
Randomize
