Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
Passing out on a toilet is not classy no matter what you're wearing. Not even a pea coat.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
All I've done today is nap, eat candy and get off from my vibrator. I didn't know it was possible to be THIS single.
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
Jenna is yelling bc of the condom wrappers and cum stains. This is the 3rd and last time you have sex in my roommates bed.
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
