Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
Dude you spent the last hour of the night in the bathroom crying, asking someone why you will never be as smart as Mr.Feeney from boy meets world.
Apparently he always goes for the wrong girl so it should be easy for me to nail him.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
I mean, how many people can say they helped surgically remove something from their body? Other than the guy that got his hand stuck under a rock and cut it off. Doesn't count
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
I'm having to shit out rocks
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