I wannas sexs uuuuu
i think my mom watched the whole time
What's the over under on catching something from your sister?
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Is it too early to start pregaming for St. Patty's?
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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