White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
I woke up at 2 pm to my roommate checking my pulse.
you know its bad when everytime i put on a shirt i think of who i hooked up with in it
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
If you listen closely you can hear the sound of inbreeding and shame.
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
I feel like calling off tonight. Is a strong desire for masturbation a valid reason?
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
You need a new phone. When you talk it sounds like the teacher from Peanuts while she's trying to give a blowjob.
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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