I'm too stoned for this. I'm Canadian.
Her gag reflex was as absent as a father figure must have been in her childhood
ugly people sure do ruin things
i wish his balls had a scratch and sniff sticker elsewhere so i would know before i even went down there
You went down on Rachel in front me last night. Worst. Brother. Ever.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
I just love it. It's warm and soft and the rest of the world is so mean. My bed would never be mean to me
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Mom is talking about dicks with her friends in the living room. I am 5 seconds away from scaling the bathroom window out of here.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Randomize
