You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
just opened a can of spagetti o's with a butter knife. the things u will do for food when ur stoned.
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
Hey, I got 20% of the people home that I was responsible for. I can't be expected to do much more.
Also I'm very proud of th fact that I walked my dog before bed. Drunk dog walking should be an Olympic sport; it takes SKILLS.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
He was referring to me as "Teenage Dream" the whole night
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