the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?
My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
the best part is my dad got arrested for the same thing at the same bar 30 years ago... so he cant be mad
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
I believe I can fly has to be one of the most inspirational songs of our time. Seriously R. Kelly nailed it
Then he went and peed on those teenagers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
low point in my life last night. licked pizza grease off my iphone screen..
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I just connected with one of your drug dealers on LinkedIn.
Like its not even midnight and I've already had enough of her for all of 2015
According to timehop today marks the 3rd anniversary of my 1st blackout
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
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