i just heard one Asian kid say to another, "i bet if i could get into Harvard i could get laid all the time, my brother lost his virginity the first night there."
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I have a pocket in my purse that is just for condoms and cocktail swords. I feel like that speaks volumes about me as a person
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
DC is easy, you will figure it out.
I'm drunk and blonde. You are wayyyy underestimating this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
how am i in montreal? thats like a 3 hour train ride. i remember nothing.
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