she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
you kept saying "no santa, im not having sex with you. it's not your holiday".
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
I'm cool with a hey old buddy how have you been want to fuck me in the butt kind of thing
The amount of effort it's taking me to not shit my pants this morning is probably a sign to slow down the drinking
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
Randomize
