I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
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Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
you started keeping track of only every even numbered drink you had
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
I've turned into a small time drug dealer, now who's the real MVP.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
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