glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
She loves me even though she knows all Ive done. Shes kind of like jesus.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Russell brand is gross. Everytime I see him I just wanna give him a bath. He's like a used condom.
Well I just put wine in my tea
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
Grandma keeps pulling a bottle of captain from her pocket and spiking people's drinks.. She just yelled "I'm DAMN HOT to be a grandma!" .. I LOVE HER.
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