She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
i just discovered how you can fold down the cardboard sleeve on a hot pocket. Life just got a whole lot easier.
I'm pretty sure if an eight year old calls you a whore.. it's true. just saying.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
Just spent the last 5 minutes laughing at my epipen. i think i'm too high.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
I sat on the bathroom floor yelling "hell hath no fury!" for about 20 minutes.
It's definitely revenge time.
Fyi, shaking your genitals at me doesn't count as "trying to have sex".
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize