Texts From Last Night

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  (616): View more from Michigan

  U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers

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  (616): U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers http://tfl.nu/yb16
  Replies (4) Good night (628) Bad night (862) Order T-Shirt
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  (207): View more from Maine

  can u get pink eye on your cock?

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  (207): can u get pink eye on your cock? http://tfl.nu/aw6r
  Replies (19) Good night (531) Bad night (5432) Order T-Shirt
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  (607): View more from New York

  he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him

  (313): View more from Michigan

  at least he gets points for a creative booty call

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  (607): he texted me at 1 in the morning to ask if i wanted to come over and play in the snow with him (313): at least he gets points for a creative booty call http://tfl.nu/28qp
  Replies (16) Good night (7208) Bad night (498)
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  (512): View more from Texas

  and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through

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  (512): and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through http://tfl.nu/6tx9
  Replies (14) Good night (5233) Bad night (774) Order T-Shirt
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  (216): View more from Ohio

  When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.

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  (216): When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning. http://tfl.nu/aoha
  Replies (3) Good night (3758) Bad night (793) Order T-Shirt
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  (716): View more from New York

  I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.

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  (716): I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward. http://tfl.nu/2euk
  Replies (5) Good night (2112) Bad night (721) Order T-Shirt
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  (917): View more from New York City

  Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.

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  (917): Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea. http://tfl.nu/2kaw
  Replies (12) Good night (1708) Bad night (888) Order T-Shirt
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  (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with.

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  (412): He somehow managed to bang-mail me last night. I woke up this morning to a voicemail from 1:54 a.m. of moaning and screaming. I now know how talented he is and how annoying I am to have sex with. http://tfl.nu/33qn
  Replies (8) Good night (3012) Bad night (951)
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  (530): View more from California

  I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting"

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  (530): I thought he wouldn't talk to me again. You know, what's that saying "why buy the cow when you can fuck it six hours after meeting" http://tfl.nu/k1xw
  Replies (7) Good night (1901) Bad night (793) Order T-Shirt
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  (313): View more from Michigan

  Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?

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  (313): Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today? http://tfl.nu/iyco
  Replies (3) Good night (1706) Bad night (731) Order T-Shirt
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  (206): View more from Washington

  I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.

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  (206): I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again. http://tfl.nu/7eb6
  Replies (6) Good night (1112) Bad night (353) Order T-Shirt
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  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home

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  (617): Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home http://tfl.nu/toow
  Replies (2) Good night (353) Bad night (867) Order T-Shirt
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out.

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  (202): I'm gonna have to get you a special blowjob bib -- like a lobster bib -- but instead of a picture of a little red lobster, it will have a picture of a penis, with 3 big squirts coming out. http://tfl.nu/03ma
  Replies (4) Good night (574) Bad night (236)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable.

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  (610): The last thing I remember was naked hot tub and taking a shot and using the hot tub water as a chaser. Not acceptable. http://tfl.nu/zn9i
  Replies (1) Good night (193) Bad night (701) Order T-Shirt
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  (518): View more from New York

  I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean

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  (518): I tripped while walking across the stage and while trying to pick my diploma back up my flask fell out in front of the dean http://tfl.nu/nhpo
  Replies (2) Good night (1149) Bad night (159) Order T-Shirt

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