cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
i just bought ciggarettes using my court citation as id. I've reached an all time low.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
He was crying to my sister about feeling like a bad person. Then he groped my breasts.
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I woke up to my one night stand and he said, "now that's the one to beat"
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
...its technically supposed to be for the bridal shower but I think I can find an ensemble that says "im hopped up on x. Stick your tongue down my throat." As well as " im supporting your marriage to my brother"
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
So I guess I walked across campus with "pat my ass" in sharpie on my forehead.
You deserve it, you colossal cock block.
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