Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
That drug basically just makes anything that's in your mouth awesome
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
He was trying to hotbox the banana suit. Of course we traded him for vodka.
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
He gave me one look and told me I'm not allowed to board the plane if I'm still as drunk by departure time.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
Nothings harder than putting on a frozen condom.. or should I say softer
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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