I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Idk yet. Trying to convince him to get a phoenix bird tattoo first
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
I woke up while she was taking a panoramic photo of my morning wood
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