i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
I figured out plans for New Year's and by figuring out I mean I've got a sugar bowl of cocaine. Start at 10?
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I'm slightly more gay than I thought. I'd go so far as to say I'm a top.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
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