I want to stick my p in your. b.
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
Wella between the drunkards, the inevitable slutty costumes, and someone doing a BODY SHOT OFF A PREGNANT GIRL, i lost my halloween spirit. Bah humbug.
i just was bootyclappin in front of homeless men in a back alley
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Some random at the bar just whispered in my ear that he wants to eat me out while on bath salts....
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
You know you're too high when you find yourself crying at " hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette because it's "just TOO REAL"
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
What use have I for dignity? It just get's in the way of the really fun stuff.
Randomize